To help you choose the one to watch next, here is Every Krampus Movie, Ranked. It’s a more competent movie than Krampus: The Reckoning, but it’s also entirely uninteresting. In the movies, there is seemingly no agreement about who or what the Krampus actually is, past the common details that the creature is horned, hairy, and somehow associated with Christmas. I kinda want to drop everything and go watch The Night Shift. At that point, you know what you’re doing to people. So without further ado, I present you, Naughty to Nice: The Twelve Films of Krampus! In the film, a dysfunctional family squabbling causes a young boy to lose his festive spirit. As an unexpected result, this list will also document my descent into absolute insanity. Mood/Mental State: Why am I not drinking faster? David Koechner, Quality of Film: This is the worst film I’ve ever watched. | This is pretty much the definition of a movie that was better than expected, but not great. We’ll find out soon, because the sequel is up next. It seems like they actually learned from what people didn’t like about the first film. There were also cards that were a little more…adult. I found more booze. 4/5. Stars: Quality of Film: If I were the kind of guy that made traditions out of watching holiday movies, Rare Exports would easily make the cut. When I said I hoped for more surprises, this is not what I meant. It’s unfortunate, because that would have been a really cool Krampus. Brendon Cooke, 80 min There’s a decent twist, and the main characters actually look and act like real people. There isn’t enough booze left to get me through this. KRAAAAAAAAMPUS NIIIIIGHT! Andrew Jay, You might also get some kicks out of Mother Krampus if desperately starved for new horror. At this point, I really needed a break. A primitive podcast? His long, pointed tongue lolls out, and he has fangs. Wolfgang Glück It’s just serving a purpose. And I’ve watched some real shit in my tenure at Dread Central. There are already complaints that Krampus is becoming too commercialized and losing his edge because of his newfound popularity. Revenge movies are fun, but even though there’s some good “what is Krampus” wiki moments, that big twist means this one slides down the Krampus accuracy rating pretty quickly. Characters started talking about interdimensional rifts, and I had to pause. _g1 = document.getElementById('g1-logo-mobile-inverted-source'); Is this some kind of talk show? Make sure to write your suggestions in the comments below. Jason Hull, Director: 2/5. Cute Quality of Film: Disqualified This isn’t a movie. Tell us what you think about this feature. Lisa Jay Sure, it’s a terrible film, but it does do some interesting stuff. As much as I snidely furrow my brow and take a sip from my cup of holier-than-thou when I hear about another quirky pop-trend being turned into a film, I found the Krampus movie to be great. Allison Tolman, Votes: The way he slithers through snow like a Tremors Graboid with a mission makes snowbanks menacing in a way never before imagined. Melantha Blackthorne, Like a pint of ice cream and bottle of wine after a breakup, you aren’t really tasting it. 3/5, Quality of Krampus: Not a Krampus. Once my eyes readjusted, I honestly forgot the budget in service of the characters and adorable banter. A Christmas Horror Story had this idea, so their Krampus is Rob Archer, a man so jacked that he might actually be a mythical beast in disguise. Therefore, each movie will be reviewed as such: Quality of Film: Despite everything else going on in my brain, how watchable is this film? If the movie weren’t eye-meltingly unwatchable, it might even be just okay. 30 min Quality of Movie: Actually not that bad. “A Christmas Horror Story” is to be commended for not only it’s delightfully daffy ad campaign, sporting old Saint Nick actually doing combat with Krampus, but also being ambitious enough to deliver not one but four tales of terror that actually intertwine rather than be separate entities. | Gross: Love He’s not particularly frightening, but he is a real life Krampus. What do magic mushrooms, Arctic Shamans, and the pagan god Odin have to do with Santa Claus? Vilma Degischer, Horror The first of the many, many cash grabs I watched tonight, Krampus: The Reckoning is kind of notorious for its terrible CGI monster. Action, Horror, Thriller, Five years after the murder of his wife and disappearance of his daughter, former police officer Jeremy Duffin is brought back to help in the hunt for a yuletide monster that punishes ... See full summary », Director: Once again, toss-up. De Krampus is een beestachtige demon uit de folklore van de Alpen-regio's.Het woord komt van het Oudhoogduitse woord voor klauw: Krampen. It’s crazy to say that something so bad is an oasis of sanity, but it’s just so impossible to conjure up any emotions at all. The replacement booze is gone. 5/5, the best there is. Interwoven stories that take place on Christmas Eve, as told by one festive radio host: A family brings home more than a Christmas tree, a student documentary becomes a living nightmare, a Christmas spirit terrorizes, Santa slays evil. The windows movie maker effects. Here are 10 surprising facts you probably didn’t know about Krampus. At first I was excited for this movie, now i wanna ***** shove a Christmas tree up KRAMPUS'S KRAMPUSSY! Quality of Film: This film is a mess, but surprisingly it isn’t the biggest mess. While there is certainly debate as to whether this holiday is appropriate for children, it continues to be celebrated throughout Bavaria, Austria, Central Europe, and beyond. I’m probably the only person in the universe that recognized this, but during the scene where the family is all seated around the TV to watch a Christmas special, they’re actually all watching the opening of Krampus: The Reckoning. 2.5/5, Quality as Krampus Movie: I want to disqualify it, but seeing as how Krampus is right in the title I can’t. I wanted to end the night on something I knew would be good, but unfortunately my brain had melted out of my ears at this point. “Yes… yes… punish children… yesssss…” Unfortunately, I have to rate it lower, as Santa actually takes center stage and pushes Krampus to the sidelines. This movie was great two years ago, and is great now. Krampus, the new Christmas horror movie, ... From there, Krampus lays out a pretty good human conflict for a Christmas movie — this family is at each other's throats. De Krampus is in de Alpenregio de metgezel van Sint-Nicolaas.Hij komt voor in onder andere Beieren, Oostenrijk, Hongarije, Slovenië, Kroatië, Italië … Christmas miracles do happen! Zoe, a strange child, has a not so imaginary friend Krampus, who is the dark companion of St. Nicholas. That was funny. Unfortunately, I just can’t count it. I compiled this list first by researching movies about Krampus. It plays it straight, presenting the ridiculous situation of a killer animal Santa Clause and running with it. Anyways, Mother Krampus is more of a ghost/slasher film. Practical effects instead of CGI monsters, more blood, some character banter, and a more focused plot. The slight little hints that Santa was behind it all as some kind of moral arbiter was cool, giving a different take on the Kris Kringle myth. 4/5. 4/5, Quality of Krampus: This is where the film’s budget hurts it the most. Plus it managed to get the song stuck in my head. But it wasn’t. As is, it served its purpose. 99 min Stars: The film stars Adam Scott, Toni Collette, David Koechner, Allison Tolman, Conchata Ferrell, Emjay Anthony, Stefania LaVie Owen, Lolo Owen, Queenie Samuel, Maverick Flack, Sage Hunefeld, and Krista Stadler. 1.5/5, Quality of Krampus: I can’t believe I’m doing this, but the Krampus in Krampus: The Christmas Devil is probably the best of the knockoffs. 2.5/5, Quality of Krampus: This is where the film flounders the most. This is why I’m alone. Quality of Krampus: The Krampus in this video is mostly a real life dude dressed up like Krampus going about a festival and Kramping it up. Looks like I’ll make it. I just did the math, and if my numbers aren’t wrong, I’ve now watched Krampus for 27 straight hours. The krampus is just a goat dude, and they don’t even have the money to make its tracks look right. This thread is archived. Quality as Krampus Film: This is how I would normally review a movie for Dread Central, but in the context of all the Krampus movies. Monica Engesser, It’s really a toss-up between this and Krampus: The Reckoning for top dog among Krampus films I’d never be caught dead watching again. The terrible video quality. Really, it’s true. A scary bedtime story on Christmas Eve leads to the worst night ever. Some time where I didn’t experience it so pre-pissed off. 2.5/5. Aside from it currently existing on Amazon and the memory it seared into my brain, I cannot find any other evidence of this movie existing. _g1.classList.remove('lazyload'); It’s not great, but the acting is solid and characters well developed. Shawn C. Phillips, As far as I can tell this motionless face forward style was just how they decided to shoot their film. Is it Krampus: The Christmas Devil that finally ends me? Each story is distinct, and none stand out as being weak. Director: Mood/Mental State: Delerium You know, I have no idea when the sun went down. The characters draw you in, and the threat doesn’t feel stupid. Watching it, I was surprised to find that the Krampus was the least of the film’s problems. Jay Dobyns, I want to tell the amateur videographers of the world something very, very important right now. | Steven Hoban, Toni Collette, Mood/Mental State: Uncomfortably Confused Okay, what the shit did I just watch. Nowhere near the worst of any movie on this list, but not at all believable. Wow, now this one is going to take a bit of explaining. Many of these postcards depicted Krampus going after children with his sticks, leading them away in chains, or carrying them off in his bag. Spencer Jay, See titles to watch instantly, titles you haven't rated, etc, Brother In Law Sister In Law Relationship. Maybe that’s because it’s not a, “Krampus movies,” as much as it’s a, “movie with Krampus in it.” He isn’t the star, but he plays a prominent role in two of the segments. And boy did it ever do so. 0/5, Quality of Krampus: It’s a guy in a werewolf mask from Party City. It’s light on the scares, but there are some pretty shocking kills. | Quality as Krampus Film: Disqualified You might argue with me on this one, but never in the movie do they even mention that the horned monster trapped in ice is Krampus. | He’s similar to the xenomorph of Alien fame, possessing an expanding arsenal of unexpected yet believable powers. Mercifully only 7 min long. Comedy, Drama, Fantasy. Movie information, genre, rating, running time, photos, trailer, synopsis and user reviews. Khristian Fulmer, It’s a great film that I’d easily recommend to anyone looking for something a little different. | He thrashes the chains for dramatic effect. Mood/Mental State: Disgusted/Confused Wow, so this is how my night is going to go, huh? Or as the movie itself says, Santa just looks like that. Bruno Hübner, Chariklia Baxevanos, You’ve seen him in movies, TV shows, but most of America has Krampus all wrong. Hans Holt, Directors: Stars: Cut to two dudes sitting on a couch smoking a novelty blunt. 3.5/5, Quality as Krampus Film: Compared to the other crap on this list, I want to give Night of the Krampus a perfect score. | Quality of Film I’m tempted to just disqualify it, but I do consider short films to be films, no matter the medium. In Alpine Austria and southern Bavaria, this wintertime good-cop/bad-cop routine often exhibits aspects scary enough to put the fear of the devil into adults, not to mention young children. More good Krampus movies m. I've seen Krampus and A Christmas Horror Story and enjoyed them both. This is how I would normally review a movie for Dread Central, like a goddamn professional.Quality as Krampus Film: This is how I would normally review a movie for Dread Central, but in the context of all the Krampus movies. He A) punishes naughty children, B) right before christmas time, C) with sticks and stuff, D) by taking them away in a sack, and E) while looking like a goat person. First was Santa, who turns out is kind of a dick. The Krampus costumes at Krampuslaufs are aesthetically varied—they may be reminiscent of devils, bats, goats, abominable snowmen, or something out of a Guillermo del Toro movie. This is what the tequila wants. On December 22, a suburban family gets together to celebrate the holidays—Tom (Adam Scott) and Sarah (Toni Collette), their children Beth (Stefania LaVie Owen) and Max (Emjay Anthony); Sarah's sister Linda (Allison Tolman), Linda's husband Howard (David Koechner), their children Stevie (Lolo Owen), Jordan (Queenie Samuel), Howie Jr. (Maverick Flack), and their baby daughter, Baby Chrissy (Sage Hunefeld) Sarah and Linda's aunt Dorothy (Conchata Ferrell); and Tom's Austrian mother, who is affecti… | It’s significantly better than the knockoffs, but doesn’t rise to the level of the actually good movies. Jason Hull 1.5/5. There’s also nothing to really set this apart as a “Krampus” and not just a wendigo. | I personally learned of Krampus about a decade ago when I was going through a similar phase, but then again I also learned about that weird smiling poop log and they haven’t made a movie about that (yet). Is this a joke? ...... See full summary », Director: Krampus seduces her with some force lightning, and she does her best to look like she’s enjoying herself, but the only emotion she can conjure is the blatant discomfort of a booth babe being manhandled into a selfie by a dude dressed up as “fat Deadpool.” Two things I liked about this movie. Hans Quest Let it be known that this movie is where I started drinking. Stars: Rob Archer, Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. The jokes are all hammy, but I was chortling through the whole thing. save hide report. Go read that. Thomas Smith Zoé De Grand Maison, 90 min Then a talking skeleton in a backpack started complaining that he wanted a cellphone. I had heard that this movie was pretty good, so I was saving it for a moment I needed a pick-me-up. There were a couple gems in there, but overall I feel like my standards just sunk straight into the bottom of a roadside snowbank. Krampus Movies by blackjacknerd-739-553710 | created - 24 Nov 2015 | updated - 24 Nov 2015 | Public There comes Krampus , there comes Krampus Refine See titles to watch instantly, titles you haven't rated, etc. The terrible costume. I tend to avoid this world of imitation cash grabs designed almost exclusively to confuse drunk people and the elderly. Hugo Lindinger, The popping in ADR dialogue. There’s a reason why movies like this are targeted towards people that like getting baked, but even the most undemanding stoner deserves better than this. All that is left is my limp, near lifeless body as I type the last few thoughts as I slip into unconsciousness. The release date says 2015, but this looks like a Flash video from 2004. What time did I start? | Hopefully there are a few other surprises in the mix. But good nonetheless. On December 22, a suburban family gets together to celebrate Christmas —Tom (Adam Scott) and Sarah (Toni Collette), their children Beth (Stefania LaVie Owen) and Max (Emjay Anthony); Sarah's sister Linda (Allison Tolman), Linda's husband Howard (David Koechner), their children Stevie (Lolo Owen), Jordan (Queenie Samuel), Howie Jr. (Maverick Flack), and their baby daughter; Sarah and Linda's aunt Dorothy (Conchata Fer… Gwendolyn Falcon Jay, Directed by Michael Dougherty. It starts off a little rough, with some real bad visual editing and shoddy video quality. In 2012, there was even a horror film released in the U.S. titled, Krampus, The Yule Lord. I’d never heard of it, but if you’re a fan you’ll be happy to know there is a short film sequel. And if you want to watch Santa force a man to have sex with his daughter in an Eyes Wide Shut fever dream, then check out Krampus 2: The Devil Returns, you sick fuck. So if I give something a 3/5, take it with a dump truck of salt. Definitely top two. Honestly, it should be grateful I decided to just give it a neutral N/A rating. Chestnuts and open fires, Jack Frost and noses, mistletoe and disappointment, etc… And what tradition is more enduring than shameless horror movie knockoffs!? Just because you own a camcorder does not mean you need to make a movie. | I wish I could have the last seven minutes of my life back. Merry Christmas! Horror. Claus Biederstaedt, 7 min Announced, Not Rated Which is unfortunate, because I could not figure out what this movie is. It wasn’t good enough to want to love, and wasn’t shit enough to make me hate it. share. After other children begin missing, Jeremy pieces together... See full summary », Director: 1.5/5, Quality as Krampus Film: In context of everything else I watched tonight, it’s one of the more interesting films. But this is just about Big Papa Punishment himself. | Comedy, Director: If you’re having a good movie marathon, it’ll be too bad to like. 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